In Memory of A Very Dear Friend Who Was Murdered in His Quezon City Apartment

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These days, whenever I recall the memory of a very dear friend who was murdered in his Quezon City apartment, I would say a brief prayer and proceed to utter some lines like I was talking to myself, but which are actually lines I imagine I would have told him if he was still around. I terribly miss this good man, and I think he knows that. He'd make his presence felt one way or another; I come into terms now that I won't be able to share him stories of my daily life here in New York City (NYC) where I've moved close to 7 years ago. I would have gone out of my way to persuade and convince him to take the leap by giving up his very comfortable lifestyle back in the Philippines but decided I won't do it. I did exactly what I would have dreamed of telling him on what to do with his life direction and I have been continuing with the moving on process. And this posting should have been in my 'Moving On' blogs but I would be sharing explicit details that may be too frank and offensive to certain readers. And I think some relatives of this very good friend of mine, if ever they get to read this, will also be offended, one way or another. I've no harm nor malice against them; I just like to get my good friend's murder mystery be solved now.

In the Philippines, we usually refrain from bringing up the memory of someone who's greatly beloved in less than hallowed terms whenever we recall them, as we believe they've become saints and have to be held in utmost respect (especially because they can't be able to defend themselves). But I'll be taking the risk of being damned for doing this. This is my way to take action over my prayers to have my good friend's murder be solved and those persons involved in his murder be hailed to court and meted the correct amount of justice in due time. My point really is continue creating and sustaining awareness about this murder, which I know will be repeated again and again unless the perpetrators or the actual murderers are hailed to court and be given justice.

My good friend was murdered by someone he knew personally. It's obvious that he won't have let him into his apartment if he didn't know him personally; they're not mere acquaintances and they had met many times before. I hope I'm wrong with this but he could have been one of my good friend's regular lovers, some of whom I never got to meet because I moved here in NYC. Just like myself, my good friend loved variety. And as for someone who would show up to my friend's apartment, he'd have to figure out how to get into that semi-fortress-like apartment as my good friend made sure he would have to follow a particular process to unlock his apartment's doors just to let someone in. Unwittingly, he decided to let his murderer in.

I like to believe there was just a single murderer. And the murderer was also a thief; he took my friend's celfone, a number of clothes and other stuff. As a sign that he's more smarter than the usual murderer, he didn't take my friend's car, which was parked in front of the apartment. After much thinking I did over possible scenarios, I would venture into some hits and misses here to pinpoint possible murderers still in the lurk out there and are preparing to make the next kill. I like to believe that the murderer's a manly kind of a man, most probably with brown skin and well proportioned physique.

As to figuring out the motivations, I like to believe the murderer is someone who is very angry, which emotions he couldn't voice out loudly often enough, at goodlooking gay people who have been leading very successful lives in the context of being in Philippine society where poverty remains to be a common factor being experienced by many. It seems like it's a huge jarring contradiction that such goodlooking, well-off men would have so much in life in a sea of people who may have been leading miserable, poverty stricken (which we can only observe on the surface) but not necessarily sad lives. And these men would still prefer to have sex with other men, whenever they want it and they have the means to pay just to make it with other men. It's almost an insult for someone who has grown up in the Philippines to see that some people would behave like they're just taking so many things for granted. And someone like him would be simple minded enough to be encouraged to murder men who have sex with other men. He may have grown to be guilt ridden for some time for allowing himself to be seduced, to have enjoyed the pleasure and to have sex with such types of men and be paid for it (one way or another). Given his value system, he has to take revenge in an opportune time, which soon came to my good friend. I like to believe what happened to my friend has been the outcome of getting someone so envious and be so enraged that he had to step out and eventually kill, and in this case, my good friend.

My good friend would fit those descriptions to a 'T.' We had known each other way back in high school years and he's one of the best looking guys I've met and known. We would always be thought as lovers by strangers and other acquaintances who would meet us the first time. We behaved like we're that intimate with each other, and I like to believe we really cared for each other. I don't wonder really as to why people think of us in that manner; even one of my former girlfriends thought we were lovers but she would find out that she was mistaken. And I know why we couldn't be lovers because we have very similar tastes when it comes to the type of men we would love to meet up, seek after and get intimate with. And I supposed we were doing very similar activities when in bed with these men; we were never in bed together. I think my friend's too goodlooking for my taste, honestly.

And the murderer made sure he would not leave until he killed my friend. My friend most probably died a slow painful death. His face was lacerated on many sides and mangled, and even his eyes were plucked out (based on what I heard from another friend who saw him the next day lying dead on the kitchen floor close to the bathroom). It was a good decision during the funeral to accede to my friend's wishes (mentioned many times while he was still alive) to have the casket remain closed so his corpse won't be gawked at by people.

A number of reports on similar deaths have been made in the Philippines, and I could relate to you the stories of other people I know who have died in similar circumstances like those surrounding the grim death of my good friend. As we loved to drink and get crazy together, my good friend and I would be at many bars where we would learn from other sources about certain men who were known to us and had been murdered by unknown people. Gossip about these stories are very common. What's more common among these deaths is that these men, when they were still around, were known to be men who had sex with other men. You may label such a lifestyle the way you want. And there seems to be a disturbing silence cast over these deaths by certain members of Philippine society. Some of them are among the elite families of Philippine society, who I like to believe, prefer not to be exposed to shame and unnecessary spin of intrigues that some may think about when they learn about such stories. Most continue with their usual lives being in denial on what happened to some of their loved ones, rather than bravely facing truths that would help them lead more significant lives.

Let's see how this murder would be solved, sooner or later.